10 Incurable Awkward Moments

1. When there's someone dancing really badly in the middle of that circle at that party
2. That fat girl complaining about how fat she is, expecting you to say, "Oh no, you're not that fat", when the bitch inside you is thinking the exact opposite
3. Facebook stalking a complete stranger through mutual friends, and when you actually meet in person, you accidentally mention their photo from 2008
4. Accidentally liking something while stalking
5. Feeling your boobs bounce (good) as your stomach fat also bounces (very very bad) as you're running in a bikini
6. Going on a college tour and your parent asks about the social life
7. Pooping in school restrooms, each plop resonating off the highly echoic walls
8. Walking around naked home alone...until whoops, not alone anymore
9. Watching people pick out romance novels at the library/bookstore. It's like watching someone download porn.
10. You're the first in the family to be put in Hufflepuff.

I'm in a Haze of Unproductivity

You know those annoying people who put those Facebook statuses of their mundane lives, broadcasting to the entire world that OMG "sleep, school, homework" is like the most freaking profound thing ever? How many "likes" does one expect to get from a status like that anyways? Everyone knows that it's extremely embarrassing to have a status with no likes whatsoever. At least with a status like "lawlskis PANIS", you at least get one "like" from the one person who knows what the hell you're talking about. 

I liked Facebook back when you could see your latest status next to your name. Now, putting up a status is just like writing on your own wall, and it deceives the entire purpose of a status. It's like when you like your own post, which is synonymous to high-fiving yourself. Anyways, I used to feel that pressure to put up a new status because I felt that the very witty yet pretty old status I put up a couple of days ago was no longer relevant to my life. Now I don't feel that pressure and I don't spend twenty minutes staring at my computer screen thinking clever thoughts. Now I just don't share anything with the world except for my views on religion, Facebook, and Potter on this stupid little blog. Statuses are obsolete, people. 

Atheism

Frankly, I don't know why more people aren't atheists. Sometimes it is just so extremely hard to believe in God. Believing in God is like putting all your faith into insurance: You have to pay to get any benefits, and when you fuck up, your rates go up. But then again, everyone has insurance. It's understood as a tenet of societal norms that one must have insurance. But has anyone ever stood up and asked, "Why do I need insurance? I can certainly afford insurance, but I would rather use my money on something else"? It seems to me that there are a lot of people paying pretty high rates of praying and dedication to God and don't get anything back. Monks who dedicate their entire lives to God die of cancer. Humanitarians get assassinated. Murderers walk free.

Just so you know, I believe in God. I think God is a nice idea. I'm not one of those people who thinks God has any ability whatsoever to make a difference in the course of human nature. I do not believe that the blind man who has regained his sight was touched by the hand of God, but rather by pure chance and scientific reasoning. To put that much pressure on one person, even if he's the Big Man in the Sky, is a bit unfair, don't you think?

According to some people, the same man who made it rain in the middle of a drought, caused to drought itself. The same man who helps us fight the enemy, put the enemy on the earth in the first place. That contradictory standard people put on a mere idea complicates and ruins it.

I think the ideological world should just start over. We should all just become atheists and accept that all those miracles are just chance. There is no one calling the shots. That is not what God is supposed to be, some sort of nucleus of the universe. When you pray, stop asking for things, and start asking for not a hand in a miracle, but a hand to hold while life goes on.

Back in the Blogosphere and The Hierarchy of Success

For over a month, I missed Coachella photos, Glee reviews, personal ramblings. Every single time I opened up Google Chrome and saw the Blogger icon, I was tempted to click on it to indulge in the dozens of blogs I read daily, but I made myself stop and click on the Blackboard icon instead. However, even as I came down the homestretch of those darn APs, my mind kept on wandering to my usual whimsical thoughts and now I have a whole backlog of things to blog about. So to start off the slew of crazy awesome posts, I would like to lift the spirits of my readers with my encouragement: stop trying to succeed. 

By succeed, I don't mean stop trying to get into a good college and pursue an awesome career. But the world can only hold so many Nobel Prize winners, so many presidents, so many Madonnas, and so many Vera Wangs. I strongly believe that the hierarchy of high school directly applies to later life, and the best part is, IT'S OKAY!

The Senators and scientists discovering the next sustainable energy source are those people in high school who get two questions wrong the on the APUSH unit tests and are sophomores in Science NHS. Success almost always stems from youth, and rarely do we ever see the people on the cover of Time talking about how they sucked in high school. Sometimes I'm in the same classes as these people and although I might get an A in the class as well, I never come close to touching their standard. I used to feel depressed about that, but lately I have realized that it's inevitable that I will never be on top of the world like these other people. These people are the ones I'm basically going to be looking up to for the rest of my life, and hell yeah, I want them to be tons smarter than me. These successful people are the ones that will be the next generation of brains and talent, and I have no problem being average.

Most people fall in the average category, meaning we'll make up the electorate and the consumers of society. We will be the doctors, lawyers, advertising executives, speechwriters. We are the people those famous brains will step on, but it's inevitable that the world needs us. We may not be on magazine covers or make breakthroughs, but that's perfectly fine. How is the world supposed to work if there's no one to follow the leaders? 

Oh, and those people stumbling down the halls drunk and shrugging at an F in regular English? The world needs sandwich makers.